themnemosyne | Potatoes?

CHARACTERS: Vash & You
TIME: Today
LOCATION: Mess Hall
WARNINGS: Alcohol and being blackout drunk

[ There's a bit of a mess in the cafeteria, and the mess is named Vash Saverem. Slumped over the table like an oversized toddler, the engineer is clutching a pail like it's the most important item in the world.

Whatever is in it smells awful. Like straight up death and dumb ideas. Trying to grow potatoes from synthesized ones was one horrible mistake, and trying to ferment them into alcohol an even worse one. How he's even managed to drink himself stupid on it without throwing it up from the taste alone is impressive.

He just - he needed to get that image out of his brain by any means possible. His twin, filling the sky with blades, slicing through stone like it was butter. His laughter. So yeah, he might have been binge-drinking from a pail of cloudy death vodka.

...the only redeeming quality in this pathetic display is the P-HYMN-1.A on the table next to him, showing acceptable levels of methanol. He'll live, but he'll be wishing he didn't when the terrible moonshine has run its course. ]

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Ah. Say no more. Never enough booze in the world to stop, but it helps... a little.

[He'd wait his turn, but as soon as he could take a swig he would. The thought of the Reapers, of London burning, it all came back to him in that moment, the memory that was lingering there that somehow he had seen things, seen wars that made their fights pale in comparison... but those had never happened.]

I ever find who did this to us, I'm giving them a present. Special delivery from me.

[He might have patted his gun.]

[ That pail is making its rounds between them, as Vash isn't exactly hoarding the awful stuff. ]

Yeah. It helps... for now.

[ He sighs deeply, still trying to keep himself somewhat upright as they talk.

...well, Zaeed talks and Vash reacts.

The pat to the gun makes the blonde's face a little haunted. He knows how to load a metal gun with bullets now. He hates that he does. ]

Please don't hurt them. It's... not going to make it better.

[ Vash honey, you don't even know what's doing this to you and you still want them safe? Silly, silly man. ]

... It depends a lot on what they're responsible for. If they're respons'ble for fucking with me, I'd settle for a punch to the face. If th'stuff I saw? tha's a whole other thing. Might be doing folks a favor with what I saw.

But they're not here.

[He sounded less haunted, but the man had seen aliens attempting genocide. That was ... a lot to handle. If someone was responsible for that he wanted to put a bullet in them.]

I hope they're not.

[ Vash says softly. He's a staunch pacifist to the point of putting his own ass in harm's way, but he's also hella drunk and not about to argue when he can't even sit up straight. ]

I think... I think I'm gonna pass out.

[ He mumbles, trying to not throw up all this horrid potato mash. ]

Yeah... we definitely agree there. Nobody needs that shit.

[He blearily grabbed for some water and brought it over, setting it on the table with a thud.]

before you do that. Try small sips. Just small ones...

[ Vash can smell the water as it's put down in front of him, and he's parched despite all the swill he's had. Reaching for it with trembling hands, he does his best to take a few sips.

...most goes down his uniform, but damn it he isn't trying. ]

T-thank you. You're a great guy, Zaeed. I'm... I'm glad you're here.

HAHAHAHAH

[It was a gruff, raucous sound that came out like a guttural growl when he laughed, but it was genuine enough at the very least. He also had the decency not to slap the engineer on the back. that would be counterintuitive right now wouldn't it?]

That's definitely a first for me. Most people are only grateful when they're behind me and I've got the gun, hehe.

[ Vash jumps a bit at the laugh, but then he gives Zaeed such a world-weary look that doesn't fit that young face. Drunk wisdom time! ]

...we're more than our guns.

[ He had one, in that memory. He knew how to use it, so well that it was like another part of himself. Vash here has never touched a gun like that. At most, he's used a stun gun.

He's been shot a lot of times, though. Knowing that he might have done that to others... it doesn't fit his world view. Hell, he shot at his brother. ]

Yeah... yeah, I know. But it's my most marketable skill. Plus, I'm good with stun rounds.

[He gave him a wink as he said it. He was definitely not above non-lethal responses. If anything, he kind of preferred them. Dead crewmen didn't help anything.]

Maybe I should pick up a hobby... sides drinking.

Mmm... yeah. You should... you should teach me more.

[ Vash is wobbling a bit in his seat, brain trying to decide if to shut off for a while and wake him in the morning with a horrible headache. ]

Mkin drnk is...isn...hbby?

[ Oh no, he's lost the vowels. ]

Ya'd be shocked how much ya can make it one. Folks just love goin t'bars. Hah, not really something we do these days though. Never was much of a bar goer. Those places are ...

[He paused and frowned before taking a swig. He was about to say "Bars are killing fields" and he knew it was right, but he had just enough sense not to say it right now. Only... how did he remember that? Weird.]

Have to take ya t'the range. get practice with stun rounds.

[ Vash blinks and looks blearily at Zaeed, not sure where he was going with the bar stuff. It sounded like he interrupted himself, though, so the piss-drunk blonde does his best to focus. ]

I... I knw h'to load n'shoot a gun. Frm the mmry.

[ Goddammit Vash, stop slurring. ]

Shot... shot at m'brother.

...

[Ok, that was officially a fucked up memory to have gotten. It was inherently just... bad. A different kind of bad from hoards of monsters and robots. It was personal.]

Sorry bout that. Mebbe... stun gun. Something that feels different. Just for stopping someone doing somethin stupid.

Don't want to give you a flashback

He ws... terrf'n.

[ Vowels, Vash. Please. ]

I could... I could do stun. Bzz. N'more... no more tent... tentick... flappies.

[ There's a deep, deep sigh, like Vash is an old man thinking back to the war or something. ]

No flash'n if I'm already seein' it.

Yeah, s'pose that's true. No real flash if y'can already see it in your head.

[He waasn't half as blitzed. He'd come to this party late, but he'd be feeling it tomorrow. Still, he'd picked up something about that other person being terrifying.]

You got a hell of a whammy with those visions didn't ya?

Yeah.

[ Vash says, a little less drunkenly and more softly. ]

This has... has been messin' so much... so much with me.

[ His body glows. His eyes have lines in them. He had a memory seeing his older brother ripping apart a whole boulder to destroy a city. ]

M'so tired, Zaaed.

You'n me both. Not sure what's worse. The vi... nah, it's the visions.

[He reached over and patted him perhaps a bit too roughly on the shoulder with what looked like an attempt at a sympathetic look. he was pretty terrible at this.]

We should get ya R&R. Drinking's never enough.

Potatoes?

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